More About Moi

Here I go again.....  About myself... Trying to give that "special" someone a clue to what it means to me me, what I've done to get where I am....and maybe even a clue to change:

 

I really use to be a Very Unhappy, Angry & Bitchy woman.....  Bet you would never have guessed that one, huh?  So back around the time of my Saturn Return (Look it up) http://astrology.about.com/od/advancedastrology/p/SaturnReturn.htm  my life took a particular turn for the worse and I was given a choice: get Spiritual or go see Creator!  In other words get well and live or stagnate and die!  Luckily for me I lived around the corner from Thomas Institute of Metaphysics, where I took classes, and volunteered in the book store.  The opening of my intuition, mind, & belief system saved my sorry ass from a life in Hell.

 

From Thomas Institute, I went on to meet several Native American elders and volunteer at Hay Ride (an open forum & healing gathering for those w/ hiv & aids concerns). I was with Hay Ride for 3 years.

At Hay Ride I learned the power of love, self-talk, & affirmations. From the Native American elders, I learned about the healing power of prayer & ceremony as well as living an Attitude of Gratitude and life as a "Give-Away". 
http://www.louisehay.com/affirmations/



I give thanks every-single-morning & night, as well as throughout the day to Creator for my life & well being.  About 10 years ago, every night before I went to sleep, I began to write down 3-5 things daily for which I was Grateful. Even the smallest piece of chocolate, my cat purring, a massage, a hummingbird or a hawk was something I'd write down.  I did this exercise for about 3 years, and my life began to change from one of poverty (physical & emotional) to one of abundance.  Because of my current situation @ work, I do this same exercise every day at work before I leave for the day.

 

Affirmations: I have cards on my desk, I have written ones pasted to my mirrors, I say them as I fall asleep (more to that later), and at one point I listened to a tape of myself affirming the goodness of my life w/ wonderful background music.



Going to sleep, as of late, has been most stressful.... I'd come from work angry and I'd go to sleep with hateful angry thought in my mind and I'd wake up angry and stressed.  So I began changing my thoughts. I go to sleep thinking about love & comfort and I awake much more rested and happier.  What is interesting was, right after I came up with this idea/practice about two weeks later, I was listening to Jo Dunning (an amazing woman) and she said the same thing.  She compared our minds at sleep to a data file and our subconscious as the hard drive.  In essence saying that what we go to sleep thinking is downloaded into the hard drive of our subconscious and that in turn affects our conscious thought patterns & life.
 
http://www.jodunning.com/Public/Home/index.cfm

http://www.squidoo.com/jo-dunning  




I have also learned the importance of laughter, for me, not too much out there is so "sacred" that it can not be made light of. I love to laugh and point out the ridiculousness of a situation as well as Laugh At Myself.  My Grandfathers Wallace Black Elk & Marcellus Bear Heart both taught me that "Laughter is Good Medicine". They could & would joke about everything....  Laughter is healing and if you can not laugh at yourself, then you are doomed to tears.



So through meditation, affirmations, ceremony, love & opening my being to Creator I have become a much happier, healthier, loving & open woman. This is not to say, that I do not still have my moments, I do... I'm being tested now and have been for the past year @ work.  

 


I have a running conversation w/ Creator throughout the day.... I listen and speak. I pray.  I Always begin my prayers w/ "Tunkashila, Thank-You For....."  I am affirming that my prayers are a "done deal", I'm not begging...although I am a pitiful two-legged, I am not a person in need of pity or poverty of my soul.




 
Everyone, and I do mean EVERYONE, has the right to be happy and live a comfortable life.  However, Happiness Is A Choice and a Person has to do the Work on a Daily basis in order to have a Happy life. So, when you keep thinking the shit you think and perpetuate it by purposely doing wrong to others (sneaking behind their backs, lying about them to management, fucking with their job, work, [for lack of a better word] "authority", and cyber-stalking them), then you are Screwing Yourself Out of Happiness.




Personally, I do my best to ignore those that BULLY Me and understand that they Are Not Well People. And even though I pray for them, for their own "Highest Good", I do not forget... for when the time comes I will be witness to their own undoing.

But, through it All, I Do The Work.... The Work That Keeps Me Walking in Balance (as much as possible)... I Do the Work That Keeps Me Well. I Do NOT Blame Others for My Situation. I Take Responsibility for my Relationship w/ Others and My Life.


 

Do you get it yet?  Wicosi ni Wioki......